Canceling all four Avengers titles is certainly a ballsy move for Marvel. If indeed Marvel is consolidating the Avengers, this is a positive development for fans who feel that they have to follow too many titles to get the entire story, and for newcomers who would usually want to get just one. That said, we still haven’t heard what Marvel’s plans are beyond New Avengers Finale. So I proudly present my list of Top Ten Ways Marvel Can Screw Up The Avengers:
10. The Super Human Unregistration Act is legislated, plot starts going in reverse. Stories by Brian Michael Bendis suddenly make sense.
9. The Human Registration Act is legislated. Obama is quoted as saying it’s still more probable than him supporting Norman Osborn.
8. The Inhuman Registration Act is legislated. No one cares.
7. Avengers return after a mini titled: “Avengers: Reborn”, a psychedelic trip through the history of the Avengers . No one cares, but everyone buys it anyway.
6. Mighty Avengers become “Pym Avengers”, Avengers made up by Pym Particles, fighting supervillains on a subatomic level. Did I mention no one cares?
5. Bendis unveils the long hinted-at “Thought Bubble invasion”, before realizing you can’t use the tagline “Who do you trust” when you know what everyone’s thinking.
4. Scarlet Witch says: “No More Avengers Titles”.
3. Quesada un-marries Jessica Jones and Luke Cage as the baby gets Mephisto-ed. Jessica suddenly seems to be 10 years younger and has a weekly series. Luke Cage: “Sweet Christmas!”
2. Bullseye-Hawkeye gets killed and promptly resurrected by Loki-Scarlet Witch, before having intercourse with her. him.
1. It all ends with the mega-event The Civil Invasion of the Dark Siege of M: Disassembled.
